How did I end up hurting my health again?

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How to end hurting health?

It seems that nothing is acquired forever when it comes to our state of mind. We can forget and worse than that, we can go against what we had learned from experience before. That can happen if the ideas that we cherish are ignored enough by the world around us. We easily get influenced by the low levels of thoughts that is rampaging through our social interactions and the medias. Not in a week, but over the years it works constantly on our mindset.

I’ve been able to cure my body and achieve great knowledge on health between 2004 and 2009. I also wrote the core content of my first 3 books on health during that time – most of it is still on my computer awaiting my attention. In those days, I was able to create an environment pure enough to rejuvenate my body and I was dedicated to a simple cause: living a healthy life. All my memories of this period in my life are positive even if this was a daily struggle to stay alive and purify my body, my mind was at ease and I was in peace with myself and the universe. I knew that I was doing the right thing and that alone made me feel good. I was disconnected from the pressure of the society, no one expected anything from me anymore and I felt free.

After a few years in this simple state of mind, focusing only on the essential things in life, results spoke for themselves: I looked and felt way better at 25 years old than at 19 years old. People were amazed by the result. I had learned so much during those years, I was reborn with a completely new attitude towards life, a new set of values and a new vision for an ideal life. I thought this would never change, that I would never go back into the “matrix”, or the society if you prefer, to live an typical life. That life seemed pointless and there was so much to do, a lifetime dedicated to my task of trying to explain what I had learned wouldn’t be enough anyway.

But as a friend of mine once said: health is the basis of ego. As health gets better we increase our ambitions towards life. That is normal, I felt better, I had more energy and my ideas were so clear. I was not more a lonely philosopher sleeping in a tent and cut from society. I slowly restarted a normal life, I started to work again and to meet people, old friends, etc. These people knew very little about all that I had been through for the past years. At first, I tried to explain to them but I noticed that my new conception of life was now too far from their reality and they had no idea of the importance of what I was talking about. So eventually, after a few years, I gave up about some parts of my idealogy and kept the most important ones to be able to function in the society. I made comprises to try to fit back with my family and friends but by doing that, I started to take different decisions in life and slowly lost the focus on my health. Not that I’d eat junk food or take any products that would harm me, but I was not reaching the equilibrium I once cherished and that saved my life.

For a reason or another, I had to face a lot of problems at the same time in 2008. I could no longer raise my turkeys to get quality meat because of the pollution of the environment where I was raising them previously. I will try to explain in more details what happenned in 2008-2009 here.

First, there was some kind of repetition from a previous situations that had led me close to death at 19 years old, that occured, only this time on a smaller scale. Love showed up. Love is a great feeling while it lasts and if it is honest on both sides. The thing is that there is no way to really know if you can trust someone and when it is over, you experience some kind of depressing mood that is very prone to creates desequilibriums in your eating habits and in your life in general.

A failed attempt at love was only a part of the problems that I had to face in the fall of 2008. Another deception was my incapacity to have my first music album recorded due to a lack of funds. I had put everything that I had in this album but there was no way to record it and get it heard out there. I had about half of it recorded in a professionnal studio when I had to stop the project due to lack of funds. These kind of things are very expensive you know. I also received letters from editors and all of them were rejecting my second book and my poetry collection. This was not the most motivating moments of my life.

Above all that, the most important thing was that my pure environment was compromised. Water from the source at my parent’s house was contaminated and the construction of a synthetic football field right next to where I was living contaminated the very air I could breath in or out of the house. All this being consequence or urban development in the rural region where I had been living for years. So no more pure water and no more sleeping by the forest with pure air to clean my body. I was in a state in crisis, toxins were everywhere and I had nowhere I could flee to.

I had a strong feeling at that time that I should’ve left the country and go somewhere else, where there is less pollution and less urban development. I thought of going to vietnam, I thought of going to Bhutan, etc. but these options seemed unreal for some reason. Maybe I was scared to leave what I had known for all my life. My health was still fragile and I was quite poor to be honest.

I could no longer live at my parent’s house, which was the basis on which my equilibrium was built. So I started to redefine myself, I started to look for solutions. I tried to live in appartment, I tried to live with friends, I tried to find pure water elsewhere, etc. I am not the kind of guy to give up so easily. But in that process, I made mistakes, I accumulated toxins at a crazy rate and my purification ended that year.

I broke the healing capacity of my body that year and my connection with God became clouded at that moment. I wish things had been different. A few months are more than enough to change the condition of a human body forever. A mistake that occured once can take years to overcome and compensate. It can leave traces in the body, inflammation and creates a fertile ground for deceases for the rest of your life. That happenned to me again even if I did everything to try to avoid it.

Sometimes the mistakes that we do are just attempts to live healthy and to do things right. The problem is that there is so much false truths and so many people to defend them. People don’t know what they are talking about. We place ourselves in this situation by according value to title and other stupid considerations. I’ve seen people kill themselves on some pills because they believed a doctor. This happens all the time.

The highest level of naivety is when you think that something is right because otherwise it would not be permitted, endorsed, sold or promoted. Like the people who drinks in plastic bottles, they think it is right. They don’t see the link with their future cancer and digestive problems.

And so my mistake was similar, I trusted an alternative medicine. During the fall, as all things were not going so greatly, I had abused of peanut butter and dark chocolate. Don’t ask me why I did that, because when you do it on the effect of emotion you just don’t realize it. I was quite depressed for a few weeks and I was away from my home because I could not breath the air outside due to the rubber football field they were installing 30 meters from my house. So I had to eat “on the go” and spent a lot of time at a friend’s house. It was convenient to bring with me some manna bread and peanut butter. But soon enough I was eating sometime more than 1kg of peanut butter per week. That lasted about 2 or 3 months. At first, I didn’t notice any problem. I was worried about my liver but he seemed fine. The problem was my intestine. Years of hard work to clean my body destroyed in a few months of unbalanced life due to a serie of crazy circumstances.

When I realized the extend of the mistake I had done, I tried to look for solutions. Quick solutions are often the best way to deepen your mistakes. I knew that but I wanted to help myself and to solve the problem I had just created. So I trusted a women to supposedly clean my colon with pure water with a proven technique, she said, unharmful for the body. That was the single worse mistake I’ve done in my whole life.

To be continued.


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